Anxious and Uncertain

Well!  Wednesday's beta came back with a HCG level in the 300's .. it more than doubled which is a true telling sign of pregnancy!!!  Unfortunately, Saturday I had some spotting... followed by some spotting/bleeding over the last week off and on.

There are SO many things that can cause normal bleeding in the beginning of an IVF pregnancy.  There are so many factors into spotting... the amount of blood, how long, how much, what's it look like, etc... ugh it makes my head literally spin.

My IVF clinic does not seem concerned.  Although after my consistent calling and urging they did increase my Progesterone and added to my pill in take in addition to the inserts I am already taking.

I was told that spotting/bleeding is typical.

On the flip side you hear that it's not typical sometimes!  Ahhh there are so many factors-  so.... here I am writing my stress out... sharing my stress... and ultimately.. after tonight- I am giving it to God.  I am no longer going to worry about is this normal or not.  I give it to God who ultimately is the decider of whether it's normal or not ;)

I'm not sure if this is normal for me- I would have never known this soon in the ballgame that I was pregnant (we are five weeks pregnant tomorrow!)  It could be multiple things... ugh... multiple normal things and multiple abnormal things.  NEVER google stuff like this!

I will be calling the clinic and asking to do two more HCG blood tests to make sure my numbers are increasing.  This will be for peace of mind and to make sure we know ahead of the ultrasound if the numbers aren't increasing for some reason.

I think the worst part in this is I would hate for this to be something of concern and NOT know until the ultrasound on the 5th... I adore my IP's and would hate for them to make the drive all the way here for bad news... that is why I want the blood tests... to rule out that bad news, to give peace of mind..

I am not a doctor, I do not know what is normal... I don't know what is a lot or a little or spotting or bleeding... therefore ... I just need your prayers... prayers that all is well!  Prayers for all involved.

Test results are in...

and... M & M are officially expecting a bundle of joy!!! :)  I am pregnant!

I went in for the beta test this morning and my IM (Intended Mother) called me around 11:45 with the news!

Northwestern contacted her and she asked them if she could call me with the news.  I could hear the excitement in her voice.  How great for them!  She said she can go baby shopping now!  :)  I am so happy and thrilled for my IP's they deserve their family!   Now, I go in Wednesday and hope that our number is skyhigh and predicts twins.

My HCG was at a 129 which they told her it needed to be at least 5 to be considered positive?  So :)

God is Great!

Tomorrow has come!

Tomorrow is the day.  I am going to the doctor to test my blood to see if dreams will come true!  I am very excited, scared, happy, nervous, thrilled, blessed, joyous, etc... for M & M!

Thursday/Friday I took HPT and this was the result...

Yes there is a faint second line there :)  We are praying and hopeful that tomorrow will bring good results!  Please be praying with us as well-  more tomorrow!

Transfer complete!

So... a little bit about my transfer before I forget details!

I ended up driving in to Chicago Wednesday evening and joined our IP's (Intended Parents) at the Cheesecake Factory for Dinner.  We met up around 7:00 and I didn't get back to my hotel room until 10:15... and I couldn't believe it was that late!  We just had so much to talk about and were having a great evening that time flew by.  They gave me a sweet gift to help me relax and I ended up enjoying the quiet of the hotel room and the amazing view!

They picked me up from the hotel this morning and we rode to the hospital together.  My IM (Intended Mother) joined me int he procedure room - which surprisingly wasn't the least bit awkward at all... in fact it was rather natural.  The staff was very informative- they have 6-7 great looking embryos that they will be freezing for the future.  The two embryos that were transferred today were as good as the could be and the Dr. said the placement was great.  It was interesting there was a little window in the room that went directly to the lab and the lab techs were preparing the embryos right behind the wall.  The science of it all is simply amazing that there could be potential babies being frozen...  boggles my mind!  The procedure itself was really quick.  They used a catheter to go through my cervix into my uterine lining and place the embryos right in the middle.  My IM held my hand as we literally watched on the ultrasound machine as the embryos ever so softly dropped onto my uterine lining.  (Bombs away... is what the doctor doing the procedure said)  Not too often can you say you witnessed conception!  I didn't feel much of anything and the Dr. gave us both ultrasound pictures of the little embryos hanging out!  Hopefully this will be the first picture of MANY for my IP's.  They are so excited, and I am so excited for them!  

The bright spot in the red circle is the embryos.

I go in for a blood test on Aug 20th to check my HCG levels.  I will probably take a home pregnancy test sometime before then though!

We got to ask the doctor some questions-  I had asked when "conception" is considered and I was surprised to find out technically if the embryos stuck today we would be 2 weeks and 4 days pregnant.  Isn't that crazy?!  Time is already flying by ;)

We ended up going out to eat after the transfer (Gino's East)- amazing pizza by the way.  There was a difference in the air... I think we all let our guard down and truly gave in to the hope of this journey.. all the formalities were done- and we truly are friends...  For so long they tried to get pregnant, then discussed alternatives, then chose surrogacy, then went through the process, and all the time passed and they never let it become real to them.  And for so long have I researched, and talked about, and applied, and was matched, and was examined, and was on medications... etc before it became real.  And now that it's real we finally let in to the excitement I think.  I really was blessed by our time together- getting to know each other and share and understand each side better.  I inquired about the egg donor process and how their side of the surrogacy went... It truly is a miracle how everything works itself out.  I was sad to say goodbye but I know that we will see each other again soon!  

I am really hoping and praying that these embryos take and my body does what it needs to to make my IP's a mommy and a daddy because they are amazing people who deserve the joy of parenthood.  More will definitely be coming..  stay tuned!

Transfer Day- T minus 4 days and counting

I have been so busy lately I haven't had a chance to update!

A week ago... Joe and I had the amazing pleasure of meeting up with our Intended Parents M &M at the Cubs/Cards game.  We went to lunch before the game and then watched our Cubbies beat the Cardinals.  We had a great day and enjoyed getting to know M&M better.  Joe and I both came away excited about the future.

Friday I had my baseline ultrasound and my lining is at an 11!  Which is good :)  The eggs are getting harvested TOMORROW and the transfer will be taking place THURSDAY!  This THURSDAY! 

 I will get a call tomorrow from the Fertility Clinic to let me know what time on Thursday, and if it is early I will be going on on Wednesday to spend the night.  I am getting excited for M&M.  I know how much this means to them and I can only pray that my body will respond and all will work out accordingly.